Slaying the Dragon

Afraid of my shadow?
No, it’s much worse than that

I can't pet my Black Lab or cuddle my cat 

I can't touch a light switch or open a door

It’s been too many years since I've sat on the floor

 My hands are chafed and red
from washing & washing

I can’t risk feeling dirty so I avoid outside walking

 I used to go barefoot,
lie beneath the sun in the grass

I was always outdoors; but no more.
I’m afraid of trash!

 When “contaminated” by germs, real or imagined

The pain is physical, though it’s difficult to fathom

These sensations are genuine;
such is the power of the brain

I struggle with the impulses;
“Do not wash” - my refrain

I must try harder family and friends all say

Their tolerance grows thin on my more difficult days

So expose and expose over and over again

If you look really close, you’ll see I have gained.

 Because today I’m still washing
but it was not long ago

That I couldn’t leave my house because
there was no safe place to go

 It’s important to recognize
that no matter how hard I try

OCD’s not going anywhere;
It is the way I am wired

 That is not to say I am not keeping score

Each day’s new victories, I refuse to ignore

 So one day at a time or maybe only hour to hour

I may not slay the dragon
but I can diminish its power!